"Gone baby gone" Composed by Paul Manning.
I know what it is to lose and miss a child, to live with that pain every second of the day, to be haunted by dusty toys that lay idle and unused.
I know what it is to weep while hesitating in the doorway of my son's bedroom to fearful to enter lest I remember, a room that echoes with distant laughter, with bed time stories and the warm glowing ambiance of goodnight hugs.
I know what it is to treasure his favourite shoes and to have his coat still hanging in the hall, wishing that one day he would come home to wear them once again.
I know what it feels like to sit on a lonely park bench watching dads push their kids to and fro on the swings, and trying not to cry... but failing.
I know that when I awake in the morning my son won't be there to ask me if we can wrestle, like we used to on 'Dads big bed'.
I know that skimming stones on the water is a pastime I can't handle anymore because he isn't there to count the skips and he then to try and match them.
I know that I can't bear to look at his old homework books anymore with large pencilled letters written on lines that hold me timeless in thought.
All I know is that a ghost sits at my tea table reading comic books and speaks of 'Play Station' while eating pizza and giggling at me.
I know what it is to have memories that I really believe I want, but at the same time really want them to go away. All I have left is reaching out for the 'now' and trying to get by on it day to day.
I know what it's like to look in the mirror while thinking... 'Gone baby gone', but then to try and convince myself of this: Remember to keep your child in your arms and in your broken heart, whatever happens.
Edited by WD
Source
Telboy interviewing Nadine from
fathers 4 justice on WishRadio
Questionable music content ends and
interview with Nadine O'Conner begins at 00:07:50
Fatherless Day
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