Aaaaaaand now, from the subterranean depths of a conspiracy realist’s worst fever dream come to life, it’s the 8th Annual Fake News Awards? What crimes against humanity did the mockingbird repeaters of the dinosaur media manage to whitewash last year? And what disgusting dissembler of deceptive disinformation will walk away with the biggest dishonour of them all, the Fakest Story of the Year? Find out in this year’s Fake News Awards!
Corbett:
THE FAKEST AI-GENERATED GARBAGE OF THE YEAR:
Xinyu Guo, Liang Dong and Dingjun Hao for “Cellular functions of spermatogonial stem cells in relation to JAK/STAT signaling pathway,” a paper that was published in the Frontiers in Cell and Developmental Biology journal in February . . . and then promptly retracted because it was, in fact, completely fake, AI-generated garbage.
THE FAKEST ECONOMIC STORY OF THE YEAR:
India Today and The Street and The Federalist and Nasdaq and literally dozens of MSM-tail-chasing, supposedly “independent” media blogs and channels for “The death of the petrodollar,” a viral story that claimed the petrodollar agreement between Saudi Arabia and the US expired on June 9, 2024.
THE FAKEST GLOBAL WARMING STORY OF THE YEAR:
The UK Met Office for literally making up 103 fake temperature stations!
OUTSTANDING ACHIEVEMENT IN GASLIGHTING:
Morning Joe and his wife Zbigniew (along with CBS, CNN, MSNBC and every other three- and four-letter alphabet souper in the den of fake news vipers) for “This version of Biden, intellectually, analytically, is the best Biden ever!”
THE FAKE NEWS STORY OF THE YEAR:
CNN’s Jomana Karadsheh for “CNN Exclusive: Syrian rebel leader says goal is to overthrow Assad regime,” which, in addition to sporting the most obvious, inane title of all time, features a pandering, softball interview attempting to excuse, justify, overlook or ignore the reprehensible war crimes of the so-called “moderate Syrian rebels” and their de facto leader, the globally designated terrorist known as “Abu Mohammad al-Jolani” (aka Ahmed al-Sharaa).
TRANSCRIPT
ANNOUNCER: Aaaaaaand now, from the subterranean depths of a conspiracy realist’s worst fever dream come to life, it’s . . .
THE 8TH ANNUAL FAKE NEWS AWARDS
. . . bringing you the worst deuces dropped in the turdbowl of journalism over the past year!
What crimes against humanity did the mockingbird repeaters of the dinosaur media manage to whitewash last year?
What absolute steaming crapola did the fibbing fabulists of the increasingly laughable establishment lapdog press try to shove down your throat in 2024?
And, most important of all, what disgusting dissembler of deceptive disinformation will walk away with the biggest dishonour of them all, the Fakest Story of the Year? Will Benjamin Netanyahu retain his title as the most despicable liar on the face of the planet, or will some upstart come along to take his place? Find out in this year’s Fake News Awards . . .
Brought to you by our corporate sponsors:
Jaguar – Copy Nothing. (No, seriously, don’t copy our ad campaign, guys, you will go out of business.)
and
Neuralink – Come on…get the chip! Yeah, it’s exactly what Klaus Schwab and the entire globalist class want to use to implement their transhuman New World Order . . . but Elon Musk is that cool space guy!
And now, emerging from whatever subterranean layer he lives in the other 364 days a year, here’s your host for tonight’s agony:
BEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNNTTTTTTTT KRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOCKKKKKKMMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA–
*BENT COMES OUT AND WAITS FOR THE VOICEOVER TO FINISH. CONTINUES TO WAIT AWKWARDLY. GLANCES AT HIS WATCH. TAPS IMPATIENTLY. DRAWS A GUN FROM HIS SUIT POCKET AND FIRES AT THE ANNOUNCER, WHO SUDDENLY STOPS.*
BENT KROCKMAN: That’s better.
Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, lords and ladies, assembled liars and sycophants, revolting reptiles and technocratic tyrants of all stripes.
I’ve just been informed that Trump, Clinton and Biden are arriving at the venue now and the Zuckerborg is helping himself to some refreshments backstage. And Kamala . . . Kamala is . . .
. . . well, she might show up later. So, I think we’re ready to start!
Thank you once again for joining us here this evening. This is the 8th Annual Fake News Awards, and, as you know by now, this is the only ceremony in the nauseatingly smug, gag-inducingly fake, wretch-provokingly self-congratulatory award season that is ACTUALLY worth watching.
This is the show where we bestow The Dinos…
*BENT LOOKS AROUND, NOTICES THERE ARE NO AWARDS. HE SNAPS HIS FINGERS AND A TABLE DISPLAYING THE DINOS APPEARS.*
. . . where we bestow The Dinos of dishonour on the biggest liars in the lying dinosaur media over the course of the past year.
Yes, tonight we have five awards to hand out to the repeaters and mockingbirds who vomited establishment-approved lies into the mouths of the unsuspecting public and bid them to swallow it—a disgusting metaphor that only begins to do justice to the disgusting nature of the fake news disinformation that these toadies to the technocrats and establishment-favour-currying “journalists” are inflicting on us on a daily basis!
So, without further ado, I have in my hand the first Dino of the evening:
THE FAKEST AI-GENERATED GARBAGE OF THE YEAR!
And the runners-up are:
— Stanford professor Jeff Hancock, whose biography claims he’s “well-known for his research on how people use deception with technology,” for apparently using deception with technology by citing numerous academic works that “appear to have been made up by artificial intelligence software like ChatGPT.”
— Amazon Fresh for their “Just Walk Out” “AI-powered” cashless video surveillance system that in reality turned out to be 1,000 underpaid Indians.
— And Meta for their nightmarish plan to unleash AI-generated characters—complete with profiles, backstories and “personalities”—on all their garbage social media platforms . . . which, it quickly emerged, they’ve already secretly been doing for years! (Just ask “Liv,” Meta’s “black, queer” AI chatbot masquerading as a regular user, or “Grandpa Brian,” an “African-American retired entrepreneur who was born in Harlem in 1938 to Caribbean immigrant parents” but who never actually existed! But don’t worry, guys, Zuckerborg is totally based now and he’s part of that cool Thielverse thing you haven’t been hearing about, so I’m sure it’ll all turn out well!
And the losers are:
Xinyu Guo, Liang Dong and Dingjun Hao for “Cellular functions of spermatogonial stem cells in relation to JAK/STAT signaling pathway,” a paper that was published in the Frontiers in Cell and Developmental Biology journal in February . . . and then promptly retracted because it was, in fact, completely fake, AI-generated garbage.
The first tip-off to this report’s unreliability? The AI-generated image accompanying the article, depicting a rat (helpfully labelled “rat”) standing upright like a squirrel and sporting a massive penis several times bigger than its own body and not one, not two, not three, but FOUR testicles! To top it off, the grotesque image was accompanied by nonsensical labels of made-up AI-hallucinated gibberish words like “dissilced,” “testtomcels” and “senctolic.”
As the Twitterati observed, the horrors of Figure 3—depicting some monstrous, gelatinous AI-hallucinated rendering of some vaguely cellular objects labeled with more “sanallib on cthe jcike” computer-generated babble—is somehow even MORE horrific than the rat penis overlord!
Perhaps the Dino should go to the journal itself, however. Witness the retraction notice:
Following publication, concerns were raised regarding the nature of its AI-generated figures. . . . Frontiers would like to thank the concerned readers who contacted us regarding the published article.
In other words, the editors either didn’t bother to even read the article they approved; didn’t understand that it was gibberish; or thought you were too stupid to know! But some readers brought the problem to their attention, so down the memory hole it goes. But remember, folks: Trust The $cience™!
Truly, this Dino is for the paper’s authors, the journal’s editors, the computer circuitry that hallucinated this revolting rodent into existence and the scientific community at large for allowing digital drivel like this to undermine the public’s belief in the scientific process itself. Un-congratulations, losers!
*BENT SHUDDERS AND GRABS A HANDKERCHIEF TO WIPE HIMSELF OFF.*
Well, I don’t know about you, but now I feel like I’m covered in gag-worthy nightmare fuel. And the night is only just beginning! Strap in folks.
And, incidentally, if you want to follow along at home, all of the articles, videos and reports dishonoured in tonight’s proceedings will be linked up in the hyperlinked transcript at corbettreport.com/fakenews8. That’s right! The Fake News Awards are the only awards show with show notes! (Eat your heart out, Oscar!)
Now, let’s keep this show rolling. It’s time for our second Dino of the evening:
THE FAKEST ECONOMIC STORY OF THE YEAR!
And the runners-up are:
— Intellectually challenged New York Times columnist Thomas Friedman for “Understanding the Middle East Through the Animal Kingdom,” a piece of pop punditry so mind-bogglingly stupid that even the mind-bogglingly stupid Thomas Friedman should be ashamed. The piece attempts to dumb down all of Middle East politics for American readers, whom Friedman obviously despises, insulting them with a turgid stream of journalistic junk as offensive as it is idiotic. Comparing Iranians to “parasitoid wasps” and Lebanon, Yemen, Syria and Iraq to caterpillars, he then lionizes the US (literally) before comparing Netanyahu to a “sifaka lemur.” I swear I am not making this up.
— The American Farm Bureau Federation for “Thanksgiving Dinner Costs Are Down Again,” a piece of PR bunkum that tries its darndest to flatly contradict the self-evident reality of inflation by telling Americans that Thanksgiving is cheaper than ever! . . . before quietly admitting that while costs are down from last year, they are in fact up 19% since the scamdemic. They then double down on the idiocy by claiming that “If your dollar had the same overall purchasing power as a consumer in 1984” then Thanksgiving would cost less than before…except for the pesky fact that the dollar doesn’t have the same purchasing power as it did in 1984. As Off-Guardian.org puts it: the argument breaks down to “If food were cheaper, dinner would cost less,” which ranks up there with the dumbest sentences ever reported in the fake “news.”
— And China’s National Bureau of Statistics for “Preliminary Accounting Results of GDP for the Third Quarter of 2024,” which reported a completely fictitious 4.6% growth rate for China’s GDP in the 3rd quarter. Not only did former Chinese Premier Li Keqiang privately admit in 2007 that “China’s GDP figures are ‘man-made’ and therefore unreliable,” but prominent Chinese economist Gao Shanwen—the chief economist at China’s largest state-owned investment holding company, SDIC—called out the ChiCom’s fake GDP number late last year, calculating that China in fact averaged “around 2%” of GDP growth in the last two to three years.” So, what’s Shanwen saying now? No one knows! Since making his comments, he’s been placed under investigation by the Chinese government and banned from speaking publicly for an unspecified period of time!
And the loser is:
India Today and The Street and The Federalist and Nasdaq and literally dozens of MSM-tail-chasing, supposedly “independent” media blogs and channels for “The death of the petrodollar,” a viral story that claimed the petrodollar agreement between Saudi Arabia and the US expired on June 9, 2024.
The problem? The petrodollar agreement was in fact never a formal agreement and thus has no “expiry date,” meaning it can’t be “cancelled” and doesn’t need to be renewed!
That’s right, folks, as very few pundits at the time seemed to realize, the petrodollar system was a backroom deal cut by Kissinger on behalf of the Rockefellers and the US deep state to entice the Saudis to price oil in dollars in exchange for military protection from Uncle Sam. That secret, informal deal was derided as conspiracy theory until it was finally acknowledged by the mainstream liars in 2016 (a story covered by The Corbett Report nearly a decade ago, for those keeping track at home).
No, what ended on June 9th was not the petrodollar system but The U.S.-Saudi Arabian Joint Commission On Economic Cooperation, which was not a formal part of any non-existent petrodollar “agreement.”
So how did this story get reported and picked up and spread around the world literally hundreds of times before anyone even thought to question it? Because all most repeaters do is sheepishly repeat things they read without ever looking at source material or seeking to confirm reports.
As Derrick Broze noted in his detailed debunking of this petrodollar nonsense for The Last American Vagabond, a number of outlets that first misreported the story—including The Atlantic Council and TipRanks, whose ironically apt tagline is “Know Who To Trust”—had to walk the tightrope of issuing retractions, corrections or clarifications when their fake news turned out to be a pile of steaming horse manure while simultaneously not admitting that they have no idea what they’re talking about. Worst of all, it gave the usual gaggle of “fact checkers” an easy slam dunk by correcting the record on all the blogs that immediately ran with the story.
So, in short: the death of the petrodollar has been greatly exaggerated, and don’t believe everything you read on the internet (whether from establishment sources or supposedly independent ones!). And to the liars goes the Dino.
OK, now that we’re sufficiently warmed up . . . let’s cool down! That’s right, now it’s time for a word from our corporate sponsor:
*SWORD DANCING FOR DUMMIES COMMERCIAL*
KROCKMAN: [*CLAPPING ENTHUSIASTICALLY*] Fantastic!
Welcome back, folks. It’s now time to present our third Dino of the evening, the award for:
THE FAKEST GLOBAL WARMING STORY OF THE YEAR!
And the runners-up are:
— Sky and the BBC and Australia’s ABC and a slew of other fake news MSM outlets for blaming an imaginary air turbulence problem on fake weather gods
— The UK Met Office for telling the public that the cold April they experienced was all in their heads.
— Every mainstream media outlet and every establishment institution and every scientific paper that assert in a self-deconstructing argument that every country is simultaneously warming faster than every other country!
— Columbia Climate School for fearmongering about the Great Barrier Reef, which, in reality, just hit a new record coral cover for the third year in a row.
— Axios, The Washington Post, the Associated Press, USA Today, and the New York Times, and dozens of other dinosaur media liars for ginning up a fake news fear campaign over heat deaths during the annual Hajj in Saudi Arabia, incorrectly attributing them to angry weather gods instead of cyclical weather patterns because “climate” is only “weather” when it’s cold outside.
— Michael Mann and his colleagues for forecasting an “unprecedented 33 named tropical cyclones” in 2024, a prognostication that turned out to be the “wrongest count ever predicted.”
— And the EU’s Copernicus Climate Change Service for using their climate crystal ball to “report” in advance that 2024 will be the hottest year ever—a claim that comes from their “reanalysis” dataset that only goes back 80 years and doesn’t even use actual thermometer readings, instead combining “past observations with models to generate consistent time series of multiple climate variables.”
And the loser is:
The UK Met Office for LITERALLY MAKING UP 103 FAKE TEMPERATURE STATIONS AND REPORTING 30-YEAR AVERAGES FROM THOSE NON-EXISTENT SITES!
That’s right, as originally reported by Ray Sanders and followed up in a series of extensive reports by The Daily Sceptic, the UK’s national weather and climate service has been involved in a massive, ongoing scheme to control the future by controlling the past, creating data for 103 of their 302 weather stations that seemingly do not exist!
The site for “Dungeness,” for example, provides 30-year rolling temperature averages from 1960 to 2020 but fails to disclose that the station in fact closed in 1986. Through diligent efforts and actual reporting, Sanders was able to obtain records via a Freedom of Information request that allowed him to determine which stations actually exist.
Keep in mind, this is the same Met Office that lists an airport weather station that goes back to 1873 (30 years before airplanes were invented!) and that keeps a record in which 80% of their listed weather stations are sited in locations that had internationally recognized “uncertainties” between 2-5°C, making the purported tenths of a degree of “global warming” in recent decades statistically meaningless!
*BENT RAISES HAND TO EAR*
WAIT JUST A SECOND! THIS JUST IN: this whole story has been “debunked“ by “Science Feedback,” a Meta/TikTok/IFCN/EU/Google News Initiative-funded “fact checker” site that claims the whole “inventing stations” idea is fake news because:
Certain weather stations collect decades of data, but later need to close down. Rather than letting this data go to waste, scientists are able to combine this past data with more recent data from nearby well-correlated stations (i.e., those with similar trends) to look at long-term climate trends. This is a scientific method that is published in reputable peer-reviewed papers and is used by other organizations around the world; it is not “data fabrication.”
But, as The Daily Sceptic notes in a detailed rebuttal (that is well worth the read), the Met Office in fact goes out of its way to use “adjusted, amended, modified and likely corrupted” data from inferior sites over long-term, reliable data from top quality Class 1 sites because: a) Almost all of their weather stations are listed as Class 4 or Class 5 sites (i.e., junk sites with unreliable data unfit for weather reporting) by the World Meteorological Organization and b) Class 5 junk data sites are more likely to report anomalous “hottest ever” temperature readings.
So, what does all this mean? It means don’t trust the UK Met Office to tell you the weather in 2125, that’s what it means! It’s fake news!
So, here’s your Dino, Met Office. You earned it for one of the most shameless attempts at lying to the public in a field overwhelmed with people shamelessly lying to the public. Let’s hope the public finally sees through your charade and completely and totally eliminates your funding forever!
Alright, folks, moving right along, the penultimate award of the evening is in my hands right now. This is the Dino dishonouring this year’s:
OUTSTANDING ACHIEVEMENT IN GASLIGHTING!
And the runners-up are:
— The BBC for “Newcastle grooming gang jailed for raping 13-year-old girl,” which reports on a gang that used threats, violence, rape and torture on a 13-year-old girl, making her life a “living nightmare” . . . and then casually admitting at the bottom of the article that the leader of this gang of despicable child rapers was lauded in a 2016 BBC puff piece on the plight of Syrian refugees in the UK at the same time that the gang leader had been charged with sexual assault. Whoopsie.
— The Bulletin of Atomic Scientists for “Chinese nuclear weapons, 2024,” a Pentagon-sourced hit piece that uses scary-looking pictures of inflatable domes to conclude that China will have 1,500 NUCLEAR WARHEADS BY 2035!!! You can take that fake news prognostication to the bank because when has the Pentagon ever lied about a foreign enemy’s nuclear build up (or a foreign friend’s nuclear stockpile)? (And, in a Dinos first, The Bulletin of Atomic Scientists gets a special bonus nomination for: “PRESS RELEASE: Doomsday Clock remains at 90 seconds to midnight,” an embarrassingly stupid piece of propaganda that would better be summarized as “EXTRA! EXTRA! Doomsday Clock doesn’t change!” or, as Off-Guardian admirably summarizes it: “Made-up clock tells imaginary time.”
— And The New York Times for “Kennedy’s Vow to Take On Big Food Could Alienate His New G.O.P. Allies,” which included a “fact check” claiming that Kennedy was wrong in asserting that the American Froot Loops ingredients list differed from that found in foreign versions of the product, with the crack repeaters at the Old Grey Presstitute claiming, “The ingredient list is roughly the same.” When this flatly incorrect statement was absolutely obliterated on social media, it was magically changed to clarify that “[h]e was wrong on the ingredient count, they are roughly the same.” Remember, folks, The New York Times thinks so poorly of your intelligence that they buried their “correction” at the very bottom of this 41-paragraph article and hoped you would be too dumb to notice! Remarkably, The Times then doubled down on this fatuous food falsehood with, “Sorry, but This Is the Future of Food,” in which they argue that eating healthy food and using organic, regenerative farming practices will anger the weather gods so . . . shut up and eat your Froot Loops, you ungrateful peasants!
And the loser is:
Morning Joe and his wife Zbigniew (along with CBS, CNN, MSNBC and every other three- and four-letter alphabet souper in the den of fake news vipers) for “This version of Biden, intellectually, analytically, is the best Biden ever!”
JOE SCARBOROUGH: Start your tape right now because I’m about to tell you the truth. And eff you if you can’t handle the truth.
This version of Biden intellectually, analytically, is the best Biden ever. Not a close second. And I have known him for years. The Brzezinskis have known him for 50 years.
If it weren’t the truth I wouldn’t say it.
SOURCE: Why ‘this version of Biden’ is best version of Biden
KROCKMAN: Uh, Joe? Is everything OK over there? Blink twice if Mika has a gun pointed at you off-camera. I mean, when you say “this” version of Biden . . . which version of Biden did you mean, exactly?
PRESIDENT JOE BIDEN: There is some movement . . . and I don’t wanna, I don’t wanna . . . [inaudible] choose my words.
[. . .]
BIDEN: And now I want to hand it over to the President of Ukraine, who has as much courage as he has determination. Ladies and gentlemen President Putin.
[. . .]
BIDEN: I wouldn’t have picked Vice President Trump to be Vice President, did I think she would was not qualified to be President.
[. . .]
BIDEN: There’s some movement . . . there’s been . . . a response.
[. . .]
BIDEN: And I sat down and I said “America’s Back!” and Mitterand from Germany . . . I mean from France, looked at me and said . . . uh . . . s-said . . . ya know . . . what, why, “h-how long you back for?”
[. . .]
BIDEN: We hold these truths to be self ah-vident. All men and women created by th- . . . oh you know th-, you know the thing.
[. . .]
BIDEN: . . . from . . . the ah . . . . . th-th…there’s been a response.
SOURCE: Every time President Biden stumbles, misspeaks, and falls asleep at crucial moments
KROCKMAN: “Yes, trust us, guys! We’re the mainstream media! When have we ever lied to you?”
Exactly! So, shut the F up and believe us when we say BIDEN IS TOTALLY FINE!!! and if you think otherwise you’re probably a cheapfake-believing MAGA cap-wearing Russian disinfo bot!
. . . Oh, wait, he’s totally fighting dementia. Who could have known?
. . . Except absolutely every member of the public whose face you unashamedly lied to, that is. (And you know what? Maybe we NEED cheapfakes to make Biden look young and virile again!)
Now, to be fair, Morning Joe was not the only one playing this game.
Take Noah Berlatsky, who brazenly asserted, “There’s virtually no evidence that Biden is in cognitive decline” just months after special counsel Robert Hur declined to prosecute the puppet-in-chief for illegally and improperly storing classified material because of his “diminished faculties and faulty memory.” (Let’s just hope for Noah’s sake that no one follows the link in the transcript for tonight’s award show to Shoe0nHead’s takedown of Berlatsky to find out what he really advocates.)
But, truth be told, it was every clown in the entire establishment media clown world circus who told us with a straight face that Biden was (SAY IT WITH ME NOW!) “sharp as a tack.”
MICHAEL DOUGLAS: And the people that I’ve talked to and everybody that I have, say he’s as sharp as a tack.
+
EUGENE ROBINSON: He’s as sharp as a tack.
+
UNKNOWN CONGRESSMEN: He’s sharp, he’s fit. He’s always answering questions.
+
UNKNOWN MSM TALKING HEAD: I think that Joe Biden’s mental acuity is very, very on. He’s one of the smartest, sharpest people I’ve met in D.C.
+
NANCY PELOSI: This is a very sharp President.
+
KARINE JEAN-PIERRE: He’s sharp, he’s engaged.
SOURCE: ‘He’s Sharp’: Karine Jean-Pierre Defends Biden’s Mental Fitness Based On Her Personal Experiences
+
ALEJANDRO MAYORKAS: Incredibly sharp. Incredibly probing. Incredible command of the details.
SOURCE: Mayorkas Dismisses Biden Health Concerns: “Incredibly Sharp, Incredibly Probing, Incredible Command”
*BENT PRETENDS TO PRICK HIS FINGER ON BIDEN PICTURE*
KROCKMAN: Ow! Watch out everybody. This guys is sharp as a tack!
I wonder what animal the disgusting dissemblers of disinfo who sold this lie most closely resemble. Quick. Someone get Thomas Friedman on the line.
Well, since there is (alas) only one Dino to hand out, let’s throw it at “Morning” Joe Scarborough. Hey, at least if he’s busy gaslighting the public with self-evident falsehoods he doesn’t have time to be killing his interns, amirite?
Alright, folks, it’s that special time you’ve been waiting for. The most important moment of them all. The climax of this WHOLE EVENT! . . .
. . . Another word from our corporate sponsor!
*CALENDAR COMMERCIAL*
KROCKMAN:
*BENT FLIPPING THROUGH THE BEAUTIES CALENDAR. GETS CAUGHT ON CAMERA AND THROWS IT AWAY.*
. . . Aaaaand we’re back!
Alright, ladies and gentlemen, you’ve suffered long enough. And now it’s time for the moment you’ve really been waiting for, that moment where we bestow the Dino of Dinos on the smelliest fart to drift across the fake newswires over the course of the previous 365 days.
The moment where we hand
THE FAKE NEWS STORY OF THE YEAR!
to the biggest liar of 2024!
And this year the un-prize goes to:
CNN’s Jomana Karadsheh for “CNN Exclusive: Syrian rebel leader says goal is to overthrow Assad regime,” which, in addition to sporting the most obvious, inane title of all time, features a pandering, softball interview attempting to excuse, justify, overlook or ignore the reprehensible war crimes of the so-called “moderate Syrian rebels” and their de facto leader, the globally designated terrorist known as “Abu Mohammad al-Jolani” (aka Ahmed al-Sharaa).
JOMANA KARADSHEH: Taking Hama . . . after taking Hama . . . I mean, how significant is this for you right now?
[. . .]
“You know, listening to speaking, you’ve gone through quite the transformation. Once an al-Qaida leader. Your group has had affiliations with al-Qaida, with ISIS, and now you are projecting this image of a moderate leader in a moderate group. What is HTS right now?”
[. . .]
AHMED AL-SHARAA: A person in their 20s will have a different personality than someone in their 30s or 40s, and certainly someone in their 50s.”
KARADSHEH: So are those days behind you?
[. . .]
CNN ANCHOR: A fascinating interview there. I want to thank Jomana Karadsheh and her crew for that exclusive.
SOURCE: CNN Exclusive: Syrian rebel leader says goal is to overthrow Assad regime
*BENT CLAPPING*
KROCKMAN: Oh yes, a “fascinating interview.”
*PRETENDS TO BE CNN PRODUCER*
“Quick, Jomana, here’s a despicable, admitted murderer who, for whatever it’s worth, is still a wanted terrorist with a $10 million bounty on his head, but the new State Department script calls for us to ignore all that and celebrate the overthrow of the Syrian government. Now go!”
*PRETENDS TO BE JOMANA*
“Uhh . . . so . . . how does all this make you feel, Mr. Jolani?”
*PRETENDS TO BE JOLANI*
“Sharaa.”
*PRETENDS TO BE JOMANA*
“Whatever.”
*BACK TO BENT*
Yeah, top rate journalism there.
Now, to be fair, it wouldn’t be right to pin this “moderate rebel” softballism on Karadsheh and her CNN accomplices alone. There have been any number of fake news pieces by establishment toadies attempting the same whitewash of terrorist atrocities throughout the dinosaur media.
There was “How Syria’s ‘Diversity-Friendly’ Jihadists Plan on Building a State” by Aaron Y. Zelin of the Washington Institute for Near East Policy, an Israeli front that Mearsheimer and Walt described as “part of the core” of the Israeli lobby in the US in their groundbreaking 2007 book on the subject.
There was the BBC lecturing us on “From Syrian jihadist leader to rebel politician: How Abu Mohammed al-Jolani reinvented himself” like he was Madonna emerging from another one of her plastic surgery interventions and embarking on a new world tour.
There was The Washington Post describing al-Jolani as a “pragmatic” and “charismatic” leader in “Who is Abu Mohammed al-Jolani, the Islamist rebel leading the Syrian advance.” (Oh yes, Bezos lackeys, spill the tea!)
And who can forget the PBS Frontline interview that marked the beginning of Jolani’s reputation-laundering fake news media blitz back in 2021?
SMITH: Jolani’s stated plan was to topple Assad, seize Damascus and set up an Islamic state in Syria under sharia law.
The U.S. State Department put Jolani on its terrorist watch list. But he insists he used the funds he got from Baghdadi to strike military targets, not civilians.
AL-JOLANI: [speaking Arabic] Did we use this money to hurt people? No. We used this money to confront an unjust, tyrannical regime that is killing people. We are defending the people.
SOURCE: The Jihadist
KROCKMAN: But why stop there? We could go even further back!
Remember in 2014, when the same crack squad of PBS presstitutes went undercover in Syria to report on the covert US program to arm, fund, equip and train the “moderate” Syrian rebels that—WHOOPS!—gave birth to ISIS.
REBEL COMMANDER: [through interpreter] This is a locally made mortar. It’s a 120-caliber round. We captured a destroyed tank from the army. So guys from our weapon-making team removed it from the tank. We used this piece, cut it and put it on a reamer and turned it into this. And this is how we make missiles.
NARRATOR: But in recent weeks, they say they have been receiving more sophisticated weapons. It appears the Obama administration is now allowing select groups of rebels like them to receive U.S.-made anti-tank missiles, known as TOWs. Many of the fighters have filmed themselves firing the missiles. In addition to receiving weapons, the commander says he and his men were taken on a long journey to a secret training camp.
SOURCE: Inside a Covert U.S. Program to Arm & Train Moderate Syrian Rebels (full documentary) | FRONTLINE
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BEN SWANN: You mentioned about Al Qaeda during your speech. Going after Al Qaeda in Afghanistan, certainly going after them in Yemen as well. And yet there’s some concern about the US funding the Syrian opposition when there are a lot of reports that Al Qaeda is kind of heading up that opposition. How do you justify the two?
OBAMA: Well, I share that concern. And so what we’ve done is to say, “We will provide non-lethal insurance to Syrian opposition leadership that are committed to a political transition, committed to an observance of human rights.”
SOURCE: Ben Swann interviews President Obama NDAA, Kill List, Syria, Afghanistan
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LT. GENERAL MCINERNEY: “Syria we backed, I believe in some cases, some of the wrong people, and not in the right part of the Free Syrian Army and that’s a little confusing to people, so I’ve always maintained and go back quite some time that we were backing the wrong types.
I think it’s gonna turn out maybe this weekend, in a new special that Brett Baer’s gonna have Friday, it’s gonna show some of those weapons from Benghazi ended up in the hands of ISIS.
So we helped build ISIS. Now there’s a danger there and I’m with you.”
KROCKMAN: No, let’s not ask about how the obliteration of Syria started in the first place.
Let’s not talk about the billions of dollars of CIA funding (not to mention the Saudi and Qatari funding, the Turkish backing, and the Israeli support) that made this coup possible.
Let’s not discuss the atrocities committed by the terrorists.
Let’s not acknowledge the Syrians trapped in terrorist-held territory and used as human shields.
Let’s not question the ways children were used as political props over and over again throughout the assault on the country.
Let’s not examine the evidence that those very same “moderate rebels” actually beheaded children and ate the hearts of Syrian soldiers on camera as part of their demonic campaign of terror.
Let’s not tell the public about how false flag event after false flag event was falsely blamed on the Syrian government in order to turn world opinion against Syria, and let’s not talk to those valiant journalists and scientists and investigators who stood up to blow the whistle on these false flags.
Let’s not expose the cheesy, fake Hollywood theatrics of the White Helmets and their founder, a former British military intelligence officer under contract to the US and UK governments.
Let’s not trace the thread of violence in the country backwards—from the mysterious provocateurs who turned the “peaceful protests” in Syria in 2011 into active gunfights with police and military; to the leaked 2006 cable showing that the overthrow of the Syrian government was a top US government priority for years before the so-called “civil war” ever started; to the 2001 Pentagon plan to topple seven countries in five years (Syria included, naturally); to the 1995 neocon-penned Clean Break document suggesting that Israel (or its allies) would have to destabilize the Syrian government in order to “secure the realm” for incoming Israeli PM Netanyahu.
No, let’s not acknowledge ANY of that documentable history. Let’s not ask a real question of this man who, by his own admission, was an agent of Al-CIA-da and I-CIA-SIS before dressing in a suit and calling himself a diversity-loving, moderate political leader.
No, let’s ask him how he feels about the destruction of Syria.
Yeah, heck of a job, Jomana. Maybe you can talk about what it’s like to order a suicide bombing in a crowded market the next time you’re chit-chatting with this serial murderer over tea and crumpets while you’re at it.
And so the decade-long plan for the decimation of Syria has finally come to fruition. And, just like the obliteration of Libya before it, it ends with the regime change that the Western Empire wanted finally coming about as planned.
The only difference this time is that Assad fled to Moscow before he could be sodomized with a knife in a gutter somewhere. Sorry, Hillary, no chance to showcase your psychopathic bloodlust this time.
HILLARY CLINTON: Yes! We came, we saw, he died! [Cackles maniacally]
INTERVIEWER: Did it have anything to do with your visit?
CLINTON: No. I’m sure it did.
KROCKMAN: And the worst part is that, as always, it’s the Syrian people who have to pay the price for the grand game of the geopolitical chess players.
It’s Syrians who have had their country ripped apart by a decade and a half of brutal violence.
It’s Syrians who have to live with the terrorists who have taken over.
And it’s Syrians who will be left to deal with the mess once the imperial bird of prey has moved on to its next victim.
“Won’t someone think of the poor Libyans?” the interventionists cried 15 years ago as an excuse to go in and bomb that country to smithereens. And once their mission was accomplished, they just up and moved shop to Syria. And now? The Libyans? Open air slave markets? Total chaos? A failed state? WHO CARES! That was so 2010.
Now it’s Syria’s turn. Will Syria descend into never-ending sectarian violence? Splinter into a dozen pieces? Will open-air slave markets pop up? Will Syria become the new home base for I-CIA-SIS, giving the real terrorists in Washington and London and Tel Aviv another chance to extend their never-ending war of terror. WHO CARES! It’s on to the next square on the chessboard now.
Well, this Dino is here as the silliest token of our resistance. We do NOT believe your lies. We do NOT submit to your Big Brother inversion of the truth. We do NOT give our attention to Jomana or CNN or the BBC or any of the other known liars, who have done nothing but lie in service of their masters for as long as we can remember.
Take your prize, you losers. It’s all you’re going to get from us.
And that’s the fake news awards, everybody! Have a great year. And remember, if a dinosaur media journalist’s lips are moving, that means they’re lying!
See you next year!
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