THE NUMBERS RACKET: Hypocrisy, lies and statistics

Don’t look for consistency and truth in Government

The Slog: Jeremy Hunt loves and encourages whistleblowers, but William Hague disapproves of them mightily. This is because they have different aims: Mr Shunt is trying to get his mates into a privatised NHS bonanza, whereas Mr Hague is trying to get his member as far up the American backside as he can. This must be a major split in the senior Conservative ranks, surely? Er, no: Mr Punt disapproves of the Wikileaks whistleblower Bradley Manning, and on this they are in full agreement.
So, um, what is Tory policy on whistleblowers? Public Sector good, State bad? Right-ho, just so we’re clear on this point.
But hang on, hasn’t David Cameron said many times he does “not want to associate with tax avoiders” whereas Jeremy Fruntbottom is, of course, a chap who avails himself of this practice at every opportunity? So surely the Prime Minister must do his duty and fire the Health Secretary? Don’t hold your breath. Cameron is not in a position to fire Mr Blunt: he is a protected species.
Dave himself of course refuses to fire his own protected species, George Unborn. This despite the fact that respected observers now accept Wee Georgie’s Deflatathon method of showing the economy is growing is tosh: the RPI version suggests we’re in a depression; which, of course, we are.

Well, it seems doubtful that the PM is in a position to judge re this one, as his personal championing of the fall in immigration figures has just been rejected by the Parliamentary Public Administration Committee. The PAC says the stats are “not fit for purpose”, or in one word, wrong. Both Number Ten and the Home Office reject the committee’s conclusions, saying net migration is at its lowest level for decades. Well they would really, because that’s where they want the number to be. A bit like Osborne’s number, really.
But the PAC has a point: the Coalition is using clapped out amateur-night data from the International Passenger Surveys (IPS), designed in the early 1960s to examine tourism trends. They record 5,000 immigrants a year, and then weight them up to produce the number they now insist is right, 163,000. (The ConDemned are committed to getting the annual number below 100,000 by the next Election. The PAC meanwhile plods on doggedly to point out the “wide margin of error” in these spurious numbers, Committee chairman Bernard Jenkin summing up as follows:
“Most people would be utterly astonished to learn that there is no attempt to count people as they enter or leave the UK. As an island nation, with professional statisticians and effective border controls, we could gain decent estimates of who exactly is coming into this country, where they come from, and why they are coming here. As it is, the top line numbers for the government’s 100,000 net migration target are little better than a best guess”.
I think Mr Jenkin was being generous about the quality of guessing involved.
Anyway, there we have it: hypocrisy, damned lies and dodgy statistics. Government all over the place on economic results and the number of people coming to live here. Mendacious incompetence rules, OK.
Situation normal – IABATO: It’s all bollocks and that’s official.

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